Trance Formations

I’ve noticed over the years how so much in the personal development industry is productivity driven. Making your first million, getting the best grades, getting that place in a good university. And I get that, I really do. Dreams, aspirations, its what it is all about. But I can’t help but get the feeling that all the goal setting and achievement programmes miss one slight point. That it is the quality of our life that matters, not the quantity.

One can be so busy focused on achievement that time and attention that could be spent on those things that really make your life worth living get missed. Getting, gaining, acquiring, all seem very much “driven” activities. Me, I like “attraction” activities. I like to move toward stuff that looks good rather than feel compelled to move away from stuff that feels bad.

Think Maslow for a minute. If you don’t know Maslow’s work, among other things he is the progenitor of the idea that we have hierarchies of motivation. So we are motivated to meet our physiological needs before we are in a position to turn our attention to our safety needs (see diagram below) and our safety needs before we can bring attention to bear on meeting our love and belongingness needs, and so on. Most of us (and particularly those of us who have an interest in personal development) are privileged enough to have be in the position of being able to pretty much deal with our safety needs and turn attention to love and belonging, esteem and even self actualisation.

But wealth generation for its own sake is an activity geared to meeting security needs. And I suppose a Ferrari might be nice (people tell me they are worth aspiring to), but I don’t really get why or how :-) I have a friend who for years carried a picture of his dream home (dream home? Surely there are much more exciting things to dream about). I work closely with this friend on a couple of business projects. He recently moved to a home abroad that exceeded his expectations, but as I work with him, he still gets as stressed, is still as driven by the need for acquisition than he was before. Achieving the dream has not made him happier nor has it given him any real, tangible improvement to the quality of his life.

As far as I am concerned, once my survival and security are reasonably taken care of, the rest should be fun!! I don’t need to make a million pounds to show on a bank statement in a universe that I experience as being abundant. I would rather spend it as it comes in, seeing money as a transaction that needs to be in flow to produce change. I don’t have to outsmart a competitor. I would rather spend my time finding creative ways of working collaboratively.

Personal development, self improvement, is (in my book) about becoming. Becoming a better person, not a faster one, or a more effective salesperson. A better person. One who can care about himself and those around him increasingly effectively. Who can communicate in ways that open up possibilities for people that they hadn’t seen before and who has fun along the route to trying to make this a better world for all of us.